This past weekend, Andrew and I headed down to Stinson Beach to hike and hang out for a weekend away. I get a little crazy if I don’t get some nature in my life every once in awhile, and getting to the ocean and the trees seemed pretty perfect.
My body has been a little achy recently. No, not pregnant or sick or anything, justΒ tired.Β Yoga teacher training (with it’s hours of practice) and teaching and grad school and life have left me a little worse for the wear, and not two miles into our hike, I got sore, tired and whiny. We hiked from Muir Woods to Stinson Beach via the Dipsea trail, which is only six-ish miles, but there are 676 stairs and my right knee was aching. Several times, I told Andrew I thought we should turn back, but then I came up with a brilliant plan: instead of going there and back together, I’d go one way and then wait on the beach while Andrew ran the trail back (I’m absurdly slow and he was itching to run) and then he would pick me up. This meant I would have a little time alone on the beach, which is ideal because I get pretty giddy.
We decided to go our separate ways about a mile before Stinson Beach, and as I descended the path down to the beach, I felt my frustration and exhaustion give way to total joy.
It sounds super cliche to say just about anything profound about the ocean, but damn, it does something for me. As I sat on the beach, I was overwhelmed (as I always am) by its size and power. Sitting near the ocean always makes me feel so safe, so taken care of, because if that huge body of water can find its way, surely my problems are tiny enough to be handled. I wrote in my journal for a few minutes, mostly a list of gratitudes, but I put it away quickly, because I realized that what I really wanted to do was just sit and be there.
I thought about the walk I’d just taken, and how exhausting and painful it’d been to get to be there, sitting on that beach, but I realized that there’s nowhere I’d rather be: that the dull ache in my knee and the exhausting, steep parts of the hike had been worth it to be right there.
I’ll spare you the life metaphor (I’m sure you understand what I’m getting at here), but what struck me over and over again as I sat there was the number of times life has totally redeemed itself for me. I’m in hyper-reflective mode as I inch closer and closer to 30, and as I sat on the beach, I mentally scrolled through the journeys I’ve been through in this decade of my life, and wow, there’ve been some tough ones. But all, without fail, ended up like that hike did: in a place more beautiful than I could’ve ever imagined, a little sore maybe, but so much better as a result of having taken the journey.
If there’s one thing I want to take away from the past 10 years, it’s this: things always work out. Even when it feels like there’s no way. Even when your heart hurts so bad it seems unbearable. Even when you’re scared shitless about what’s to come. Also? Maybe try to be less scared shitless, because you know it’s true: things work out. Just keep going. Worry less about how hard things are now, and instead, get really stoked about the view, because it’s coming. It always does.
























I love Stinson Beach so much. I love how it’s all smooshed up against the hillside, but then it’s right next to the vast open ocean. I try to get out there whenever I visit the area.
My mum grew up in San Francisco and spent many summer days there as a kid. She has zillions of pictures of her childhood on that beach, as well as pictures of my brothers and me when we were kids. The place really hasn’t changed much since the 50s and 60s. I hope it always remains one of those spots that’s sort of frozen in time.
Sounds like a perfect getaway for you! I’m so impressed with everything you’ve been doing lately – you deserved every minute relaxing on the beach!
What a beautiful hike! It’s amazing how some nature can revive your spirit.
I read this early today – while working on my first cup of coffee. Your last paragraph has stayed with me all day. Very timely – definitely what I needed to hear!
Good for you for listening to what your body, your soul needed and doing it! I have been trying to tune into that part of me and not feel guilty about not doing something I “should” be doing. Reading this really made me miss the ocean so much, the mountains are fantastic and beautiful in similar ways but there’s nothing quite like the ocean.
Beautiful photos! What an incredible area you live in, I can’t wait to visit one day. I think “everything will always be ok in the end and if it isn’t ok it isn’t the end” is one of my favourite life motto’s. It’s so so so true.
Yes yes yes to all of these things, Amy. Especially not being so scared about things you know will probably work out. I am so guilty of this and it drives me crazy that I am, so much so that one of my 2013 resolutions was to ‘face my fears’. (Eep! Ha).
Ah, please be my best friend. You are seriously amazing and I just read this post, especially the last paragraph, several times. It just sums up my day today, my teacher training experience so far, my past couple of years. I’m only at the beginning of this journey of learning to worry less and trust everything will work out, but I can already feel myself shifting.
I love the ocean, I need to get there again soon.